When it comes to big races or big goals of any type in life, I am my own worst enemy. I will set myself up to succeed, cheer myself on along the way, but no matter what, in the end I still am always negative. Or maybe as I say it, realistic. Either way, these past 12 weeks, I have tried so hard to focus on the positive and being my own best cheerleader, but it’s been tough.
And now it looks like we’re potentially contending with Mother Nature and that’s throwing me off even more. From what I am seeing on the forecast, if this race actually happens, it might be a small miracle. Every day I’ve looked (and yes, I am one of those weather obsessed runners) and it has just gotten worse and worse. At this point the humidity is 80%+, the starting temps around 70 degrees, but what scares me most is the 75% chance of thunderstorms from basically 4am to 12pm. I’ve not run a marathon yet in the rain and that doesn’t bother me, but the potential of storms does. I keep saying this race probably won’t happen, so then if I cross the finish line tomorrow, it’ll just be sweeter!
So, needless to say, my state of mind is just all over the place right now. Sure, I am crazy worried about the weather, but I am also just beginning to question every little run over the last 12 weeks. Can I really hit this goal or is this going to be just another failure? The plan will be to line up around the 5 hour pace group and hang on as long as I can! I want this so badly. Sometimes I think that wanting it as badly as I do hurts me more than anything. I put too much pressure on myself.
No matter what though, I’ll still put everything I have out there on the course tomorrow. I wish I could just turn my brain off at times like this. Just show up, run and not think. Either way, below are my A,B & C time goals for tomorrow’s race. Hopefully I run away with goal A, but in the end, a finish is always an amazing accomplishment no matter the time it took you. This will hopefully be my 6th marathon finish.
Goal A: Sub 5 hours!
Goal B: A new PR (5:08:16)
Goal C: Sub 5:15
The race does have tracking set up as well. You can go here to set up tracking me throughout the race. Let’s hope there are actually updates sent because that means we’re racing! No matter what happens though tomorrow, I am so thankful for all of the support from everyone! It’s support like that that truly gets me through every mile, no matter how great or horrible those miles might be.
So, my Air Force Marathon State of Mind?? It’s still all over the place!!